I Don't Really Talk to Inanimate Objects in Real Life. Oh, Wait...

You may find these comedic, you may not. I really don't care, they're just kinda random. :)

Dear Microwave,
Yes, I knew my rice was done cooking. Please stop reminding me every thirty seconds. I'll get there.
Also, did it ever occur to you that you can be a little over zealous? I mean, you spit a quarter of my bowl of rice all over your turntable, and I know I didn't fill the bowl too high. Microwave, I think you need to calm down and cook my rice nicely next time.
Thanks,
Me

Dear Rice,
Why do you do this to me? This is the second time you've almost killed me because I took too big of a bite of your deliciousness. You either need to stop being delicious (DON'T!) or stop collaborating with Microwave to make me sad and/or angry. Thanks much.
Me

Dear Closet,
There. You're clean now. Please stay that way. I'll try not too mess you up again. :)
Still friends? Good :)
Me

Dear Schedule,
Please come in the mail soon.
Me

Dear Camera,
I know you are full of pictures that I haven't transferred yet, but just be patient. I'll get there eventually. Thanks for being such an awesome camera :D
Love,
Me

Dear Phone,
I'm sorry, but I can't wait until I can replace you. I'm sorry for dropping you in the potty, but you were being a jerk waaay before that.
It's not you, it's me.
Me

Dear Blog Readers,
I'm not crazy, really.
No, REALLY. I'm not nuts.
I just find this amusing.
:)
Kthxbai,
Megs ♥